Mommy's Gone Wild

Wanna know what happens when you meet friends from the bloggy world?

Then again...maybe you don't wanna know what happens when you meet people from the bloggy world.

Another installment of Mama Kat's Writers Workshop

Hot Piece of Ass

I thought my husband married me for my intelligence…or maybe even my cooking. As it turns out I was just a nice piece of ass, and I gave him a nice glimpse of it before our courtship even began. You’ve probably guessed which Mama Kat’s Writer’s Workshop I am writing about: wardrobe malfunction.

New to the area, I met my husband at a local business mixer. We were both attending to promote our respective businesses; mine a bed and breakfast, and his an outdoor adventure business. I invited him to my house next day so we could talk “packaging” (in reality, there was only one package of his I was really interested in *wink wink*).

In anticipation of his visit I made sure wear a cute, yet understated, outfit. I knew right away what I wanted: St. John’s Bay blue skirt and a simple white tee shirt. I watched in anticipation as the hot adventurer pulled into the drive, and I waited eagerly at the front door for him. I let him in the house and offered a tour. I was so proud of my business venture. I took him through all the rooms of the bed and breakfast; detailing the history of the house, all the while giving him the low-down on me (letting him know in so many words, I was SINGLE!)

Everything went great!! Before he left he offered to be my “personal tour guide,” and I was ecstatic! I ran upstairs to change into my “clean the house clothes.” I passed the full length mirror in my room, and that’s when I caught a glimpse of it…the back of my skirt, where it’s supposed to be zipped, was split. The zipper was compromised and my underwear (blue lace thong) and butt crack were exposed to the world, namely my hot suitor. It’s no wonder he was so giddy his entire visit. It wasn’t because I was witty, beautiful and what-not…it’s because he was trying to hold his laughter in at the sight of my exposed ass.

Lucky me, he made good on his offer as a personal tour guide, and called two days later to ask me to dinner…he moved in two months later, and the rest is history. At one point, I did confront him about the exposed butt snafu of 2006…but still, to this day, he denies that he followed me up the stairs resisting the urge to touch my crack, or that he ever saw any part of my underwear until many weeks later(*wink wink*)…

**Not my actual butt, however this is a close representation of my wardrobe malfunction.

Wordful Wednesday

We're wearing purple today.

We want to be a part of the voice that stands against bullying our gay youth. God forbid if one of our children takes their life because of being bullied for their lifestyle choice. I cannot fathom the pain that a parent who has lost their son/daughter to suicide goes through. I do not understand what the bullies are thinking as they torment these children. I cannot fathom the pain that a gay youth goes through. The last thing they need to feel is that no one is there for them to talk to, or stands behind who they are. I don't want my children to think they couldn't talk to me. I want to teach my children to be kind and understanding of lifestyle choices, and accepting if people different than them.

So today, we're wearing purple...but it's not just today that is going to change the mindset of people; it's what we do tomorrow...and the day after that...and the day after....

Solitary Confinement

I told my husband "I am leaving you."

He didn't seem too concerned, I guess he figured it'd just be for the day.

I left the jail house , warden husband, and the other inmates kids behind, and I escaped to get a haircut. I can't describe why this was as liberating as it was, but considering liberating used to be going on a vacation...by myself...to Spain, a $15 haircut at Mastercuts was like a trip to Australia.

After the haircut I bought myself some new shirts at Kohl's, then I went to a movie. by. myself. I love being by myself. It was BLISS!! I really need to do it more often.

Family and kids are over-rated wonderful! They provide judgement unconditional love, and a life sentence never-ending companionship, but getting time to myself never happens is important. And not even a "moms-night-out" or "date night" can compare to my alone time. I won't say it re-charged me, because I came home a little pretty damn bitter sad that I had to...well....come home. But I will say with all my attitude good behavior, I hope I get put into solitary confinement out on my own a little more often.

Adventures in NON-babysitting

Writing another Mama Kat's Writers Workshop
I chose:
5.) A memorable babysitting job.

Because I couldn't choose #3, even though I wanted to...I just can't chance it.

I was an awful babysitter. It wasn't that I lacked the desire to babysit, I always wanted my own babysitters club. I would have friends named Claudia, Mallory and Stacey and we'd run a lucrative babysitting business in Connecticut. I just didn't want to actually have to watch kids. Which leads me to my most memorable babysitting story...

My sister worked at McDonalds in high school, her manager was looking for a babysitter. She recommended her younger sister, (me, then 12) as a perfect fit. It was set up that I would watch his 2 kids after school, on weekdays for about 2-3 hours. A nice job, I earned money, and I was cool with that.

I showed up for the first few days of babysitting...and I.was.bored. The kids were annoying, they watched boring cartoons, and I had no interest in spending my afternoons with them. So I slept. What did it hurt? They were watching TV anyway. Well...it didn't turn out to hurt anyone, but myself. Because there was that one day their dad got home early from work(or maybe it was on time), and there I was still asleep on their couch while the kids watched TV.

Needless to say he drove me home that night, and he never picked me up to watch them. EVER. AGAIN! Who can blame him!? I think if I came home to find a babysitter asleep on the kids with my toddler aged kids running around, I would go berserk. I am lucky he was a mellow guy, I am lucky he drove me home.

Ever Wonder What a Bitch Looks Like?

Or two bitches for that matter?

bitches (noun)\ˈbich-es\: Usually two women running away with their jogging strollers without offering to help after your angelic son has flipped over the double-stroller containing your 8 month old baby girl.

Where I live....

This post is brought to you by Mama Kat's Writers Workshop...because I am always sucker for a good prompt.

The prompt I chose this week was:

Show us where you live. Not on a map (security please), but take a picture of the view out your front door, back door, or neighborhood.

Instead of showing my neighborhood, (not much of a neighborhood, and I showed a photo of my house in a previous post) I thought I'd show you all the region where I live. I am in LOVE with this region!! It's an absolute dream here, and I wouldn't live anywhere else in the world! I feel pretty strongly about where I live...so let me share with you: its the land of waterfalls, lakes, and wine. It's history is rich, and scenery divine. The nearest metropolitan area is 2 hours away. In fact, we still have farm stands where the honor system is king. Surprisingly, it's still a hidden gem, because if you ask many people if they've heard of where I live they'll tell you "no." I hope you enjoy these photos...and if you're ever interested in visiting where I live let me know...I know some good tour guides (shameless plug) :)

I love where I live because in the Winter it looks like Narnia

I love where I live because we have beautiful waters


I love where I live because there is WINE...LOTS OF WINE, made right here from grapes off these vines

I love where I live, because this was my view on my birthday

I love where I live because we have hundreds of waterfalls, and I still haven't seen them all

I love where I live because natures beauty is literally 2 minutes or less from my house

I love where I live because I can teach my children how to observe and love all of God's creation

I love where I live...did I mention the wine!? OH YEA!! THE WINE!

I love where I live because the ones I love live here

Who Else...??

Is gonna be Buzz Lightyear for Halloween?? None other than my 2 year old. Big shocker, because it's not like there will be 100 other Buzz Lightyear's out there. But at least mine will be rockin' the zebra print glasses...

Comment Sensitivity

I started this blog to mostly take part in Mama Kat's Writer's Workshops...I was always a reader of Mama Kat's, and I wasn't able to participate due to the family blog being private. It's kind of ironic that the family blog is private, and yet none of my family knows about this blog.



At any rate, one of the prompts from MKWW instructed us to write about a journal entry from an old journal. I got a few comments on the post, as I usually do for MKWW, however I don't think that my feelings were correctly interpreted in the post.

Here is the post:

really really! no really!


When I was thirteen I lived with my Dad. My parents were still “married” but my mom was living in another state attending law school. At thirteen, I thought it was just that, it never entered my mind that my parents were actually separated and didn’t tell me. So my mother wouldn’t lose touch with me, she bought us both journals. We traded journals whenever we saw each other, about once a month. We both wrote in our journals every night before bed. Once we traded journals we could go back and read what the other person had been writing. It’s strange thinking back on that time in my life. My mom was only 2 years older than I am now. At 30 I know the truth and the circumstances behind my parents divorce, and it gives me a whole new perspective. At any rate, I don’t know what ever became of those journals, maybe my mom still has them, or maybe I threw them out. If I were to open one of those journals today I think the entry would read something like this:


Sometime in 1992…
Hi Mom,
I wish that you didn’t have to go back to law school this week. I really really really miss you! It was really nice having you here this weekend. I know you said it would only be three years, but I just can’t wait for it to be over! I really don’t like my math teacher, he is so boring, it’s even worse that he’s my homeroom teacher too. I really think that I wouldn’t mind living with you, I think it could be fun trying a new school, but I guess I understand why I have to live here. I really can’t wait to see you again, only 26 more days until you visit again. Well that’s all for tonight, I am tired I guess, I’ll write more tomorrow. Marbles says “meow”

xoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxoxo, ME


I think the hardest part in reading the comments was that the main consensus was: "wow, how great that your mother found a way for you two to keep in touch." When in reality I was actually really hurt by the fact that at the age of 10 my mother moved away and shirked all of her parenting responsibilities off on my father. For me it was a hard time in my life...going through puberty with a father who was very hands off, and me trying everything I could to get my mother to accept me. In the end, I never really understood what my mother was going through and dealing with in her own troubled mind, I probably never will. I guess my point in revisiting this post is that I wanted to clarify my feelings about it all. In future blogposts I hope I can express myself better so readers know where I am coming from.



This is the Second Post in the SITS "get back to blogging and jump start your blog" challenge that is happening all week long. To sweeten the deal, the event is sponsored by Standards of Excellence, Westar, and Florida Builder Appliances, and someone may even get to take Thelma and Louise(a washer and dryer--not the movie) home with them!

First Posts

The purpose of this post is to bring you the first blog post I EVER wrote...well that would be from a blog wrote about 7 years ago, and subsequently deleted, and so I bring you my first blog post from my family blog(which is a private blog, so this should be considered quite a treat).



The family blog I keep is essentially a baby book and chronicle of my children's lives. I chose not to post the first blog from 'Bite of the Day', because well...its easy to find...just click the blog archive to your right or this link: FIRST POST (ironically they both have similar subject matter)



And now I bring to you....my first post:

2/19/2008

After some urging....26 weeks-14 to go!




Well to be honest, it didn't take a lot of urging. Just one email suggestion from a friend and I decided a blog could be fun...we'll see how it goes.


As you can see I've posted baby's first photo, this was around 7 weeks...I wonder who baby resembles? This was taken about two weeks after we found out we'd be expecting.


Tonight I told my wonderful fiance we've reached the 26 week mark, only 14 more to go, 98 days! Then we got to talking about the day we found out. He remembers coming home from work and sitting at his desk. He remembers me sitting at the table next to him and blurting out "I'm pregnant" "What?" he responded...So I repeated "I'm pregnant." He then asked me "are you sure?"

"Well, I took a test and it came out positive" And for the past several months since we found out, it's been an amazing experience!


I look back and read that post and think: "gosh, it was so basic, so blah!" I could have added more to the story, I could have given it a little punch, some pizazz! Ugh, I hope I've come a long way since then...either way I hope to write more on this blog as it's the one that has been suffering.

This First Post post came to you because to the ladies at SITS are having a "get back to blogging and jump start your blog" challenge all week long. To sweeten the deal, the event is sponsored by Standards of Excellence, Westar, and Florida Builder Appliances, and someone may even get to take Thelma and Louise(a washer and dryer--not the movie) home with them!